Collecting Confidence
“Confidence is contagious. So is lack of confidence.” ~ Vince Lombardi
You know the feeling…you are in the flow, the zone, and there is a sense of ease and grace. For whatever reason, you are feeling confident. There is a sense of knowing, of certainty and trust. Trusting in your abilities, you knowledge, yourself.
Before we go any further, it should be noted that I am not talking about that over-confident, cocky stuff, because we all know that there is a tipping point, and a delicate balance on the confidence scale. On one side, lack, uncertainty and doubt. On the other, too much confidence, which can show up in many annoying ways, but that is a topic for another day. Today let’s focus on that sweet spot where confidence thrives.
The thing is, the sweet spot of confidence can be fleeting, elusive. One minute we can be sailing confidently along, and then something happens. It can be something big, such as hearing the words “you’re fired.” “I want a divorce.” Or, it can be more subtle, and much more pervasive. “What were you thinking?” It can show up as doing work you believe in and are confident about, only to see someone else “borrow” it, and pass it off as their own. And then, poof! confidence disappears.
Relax – this happens to everyone. It’s part of being human. The question is: how can we catch confidence when it has gone missing from our lives? Confidence can’t be forced or strong-armed into compliance. But, it can be coaxed out of hiding. Here are a few ideas to start with:
Collect confidence. Have a folder on your computer where you save praise, compliments and other warm-fuzzy stuff. Mine is simply called: compliments
Do something you are good at. Something you enjoy.
Forget about it. Let go of your story of not being confident – even for a minute.
Get busy. Take your mind off of it.
Cut yourself some slack.
Forgive – whoever it feels right to forgive, even yourself.
Don’t take it too seriously. Laugh our loud.
Be grateful. Share your confidence in someone else.
That last one? It follows the idea of paying it forward. The bonus is that is is wonderful to be on both the giving and the receiving ends of gratitude, and we can never have too much in our lives.
Just last week, I received a lovely bit of praise from a truly awesome coach. We had just completed our work in The Art of NicheCrafting™ full intensive. Her words?
“I’ve spent months struggling with my niche, but it took only thirty minutes of our first call for everything to finally click! Fredi masterfully coached and gently guided me to my own answers. I highly recommend The Art of NicheCrafting to anyone looking for clarity or to reconnect with their passion for their business.” – Sarabeth Janzen, CPC www.coachsarabeth.com
What a wonderful confidence-boosting gift she gave me, right? A win-win. Instead of me trying to force confidence when I’m not feeling it, I can draw on our experience together to remember the feelings of confidence, and hopefully she can too.
Who are you grateful for in your life? How can you let them know you have confidence in them?